Содржина: Chit Chat

field of course , and woman lacrosse is awsome XD

eeks! looks like i am promoting to Div II in hockey. My arena and facilites aren't ready. You know...there are days I wish I could bring myself to throw a match. Just can't seem to do that, though (lol). It will be interesting times.

Taking an engineering class on fuel cells. Had to hand in a lab today. Prof wasn't at his office so I left it in his door. Emailed him the following and got the following reply. Not sure what compelled me to go all ancient knight on him but his reply was classic!

"Lord <name> Sir,

I popped by your thought castle to find you absent and likely conquering nobel problems (or fair maidens). I left a gift for you rolled up in your door handle for your perusal.

Please confirm when in your possession; lives are at stake here after all,

- Humble Peasant Scott"

Reply:

"Who is this Peasant that dare speaketh with me? I receiveth ye scrolls and am enlightened by their magnificence. May the secrets of space lay within thy pages. And the brilliance of fuel cells pressed upon your heart."

I think Game of Thrones has corrupted at the highest levels.

Goodie.

Awesome!

I love when teachers/professors pull off stuff like that. Wish more of them did.

NSFW Crude Jokes:

A guy gets a call from the police telling him that his house was robbed. The offenders had also consumed all of his beer and raped his wife.
A moment of silence passes, then the guy says, "I can't believe they fucked my wife after only five beers!"
~ ~ ~
I got this text from my brother recently. It read: "Can I stay at your house for a while? The old lady kicked me out after she caught me measuring my dick.
For what it's worth, it reaches all the way to the back of her sister's throat!"
~ ~ ~
I was banging this nice lady on her kitchen table when we heard the front door open. She said, "It's my husband! Quick, try the back door!"
Thinking back, I really should have run, but you don't get offers like that every day.
~ ~ ~
Sorry for not calling you on New Year’s Eve, however, I just got out of jail.
I was locked up for punching the fuck out of this idiot at a party.
In my defense, when you hear an Arab counting down from 10 your instincts kick in.
~ ~ ~
I saw a fortune teller the other day. She told me I would come into some money.
Last night I fucked a girl called Penny. Is that spooky or what?
~ ~ ~
The missus asked me, "When you're on a boys only trip, do you think about me?"
Apparently "Only to stop myself from coming too quickly" wasn't the right answer.
~ ~ ~
Some guy just knocked on my door selling raffle tickets for poor orphans.
I said, "Fuck that! Knowing my luck, I'd win one!"
~ ~ ~
What's the difference between an illegal immigrant and ET?
ET looked better, smelled better, learned English, didn't claim benefits, had his own fucking bike, and wanted to go home!
~ ~ ~
I went to the doctor's office the other day and found out that my new doctor is young, female and drop dead gorgeous.
I was embarrassed, but she said, "Don't worry, I'm a professional, I've seen it all before. Just tell me what's wrong and I'll check it out.
I said, "My wife thinks that my dick tastes funny."
~ ~ ~
I was pretty excited when my new girlfriend sent me a text message claiming that she loves anal.
Then I realized that she is a dyslexic bitch and that she was trying to say she loves Alan, my best friend.
~ ~ ~
A guy is watching a film with creepy organ music on the TV and suddenly yells, "No! No! Don't enter that church, you damn fool."
His wife asks him, "What are you watching?"
Husband replies, "Our wedding video."
~ ~ ~
I said to the wife, "Get me a newspaper."
"Don't be silly," she said. "Here, use my iPad."
That fuckin' spider never knew what hit it.
~ ~ ~
I bought a new perfume for my wife called "Chloroform".
She says she doesn't like it because it makes her sleepy and her ass sore.
~ ~ ~

A guy is watching a film with creepy organ music on the TV and suddenly yells, "No! No! Don't enter that church, you damn fool."
His wife asks him, "What are you watching?"
Husband replies, "Our wedding video." - that was good ))

My favourite

I can understand why

I have no problem with these jokes, but PPM is supposedly to be a site suitable for all ages, you know?

I don´t know if I´m allowed to post links like that, but I guess I´ll give it a try.

What´s missing for me in this game is a chat to interact directly with other players. So I decided to open a chat, where you don´t have to register and can directly chat. I´d appreciate you checking it out.

http://bloochat.com/emw97

It's already possible to chat with other players within the game.

Had a look - nobody's there..